Saying Goodbye

I know I’ve been pretty quiet on here for the past month and a half, but six weeks ago, our lives changed in the blink of an eye. Six weeks ago, we had to say goodbye.

Y’know how you kind of go through life and you hear about bad things happening to other people, but you move on, somewhat unaffected because bad things don’t happen to you? Well, sometimes they do. And while I feel like I was kind of prepared for it when he was deployed, this was one of those completely blindsided situations.

Jacob in the Army

Six weeks ago, I tried to wake Jake up, but I couldn’t. At some point overnight, he passed away. Thankfully, it was peacefully in his sleep.

Even harder than finding him and dealing with the EMTs, police, and funeral home that spent the day at the house, was telling the kids when they got home from school. I am so grateful that our amazing neighbors picked them up at the end of the day and took them to dinner which bought me a bit more time and ensured they actually ate dinner before they got the news. Telling them that Daddy went to heaven was without a doubt the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.

The past six weeks have been a blur. I said goodbye to my best friend, my favorite person, my Disney buddy, my world. I planned a funeral that I never wanted to plan. And I’ve started to pick up the pieces.

Jacob with Grumpy at Storybook Dining

I could not have done any of this without the support of friends and family, near and far. I so appreciate the way they all stepped up to take care of us and help us through this rough time and I am eternally grateful.

So yeah, that’s why I haven’t been around, but now that the funeral is over and we’re starting to settle into our “new normal” I’m looking forward to getting back to writing. Even though it will be different, we’re still going to keep traveling and moving forward because Jake wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

“The best things in life are the people we love, the places we have been, and the memories we’ve made along the way” – unknown. This perfectly sums up how we try to do life— surrounded by those we love and always on an adventure, each and every day, and I don’t plan on changing that.

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10 Comments

  1. September 26, 2019 / 11:23 am

    So sorry for your loss. Keeping you and your family in our thoughts during this time. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you.

    • Jennifer
      Author
      September 26, 2019 / 11:45 am

      Thank you so much, Kim, I really appreciate it!

  2. September 26, 2019 / 12:02 pm

    what a beautiful post of strength, and honesty. You lived such a beautiful life together and I know you will continue it for your beautiful children. We are all praying for you! RIP Jacob

    • Jennifer
      Author
      September 26, 2019 / 3:02 pm

      Thanks, Harmony! I’m certainly trying- some days are definitely harder than others!

  3. September 26, 2019 / 2:56 pm

    My heart breaks for you and your kids, this is a beautiful post and I know it will take great strength to keep moving forward as you walk through grief. I recently discovered another blogger whose husband died suddenly leaving her with four young children and every day I think about the amazing strength women have to pick up the pieces when everything is falling apart. I will be thinking about both of you, every single day. Sending you strength. Xo

    • Jennifer
      Author
      September 26, 2019 / 3:29 pm

      Thank you, Tracey! Everyone keeps telling me that they’re amazed at how strong I’ve been- but I’m only being strong because I have no choice. I have five sweet kiddos that are now relying on me for everything and I can’t let them down.

  4. Pam
    September 26, 2019 / 5:22 pm

    I pray that getting back to your writing, something that feels normal, will minister to your broken heart during these coming day and weeks. Praying for you and your children.

    • Jennifer
      Author
      September 27, 2019 / 8:53 am

      Thank you, Pam! I’m hoping for the exact same thing. 🙂

  5. Erin
    September 27, 2019 / 6:09 am

    So very sorry for your loss! Praying for you and your children, and praying for you to continue to feel the love of your support network!

    • Jennifer
      Author
      September 27, 2019 / 8:53 am

      Thanks, Erin. I’m so thankful that we have a huge support network of friends/family here and around the globe.

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